Posted in Anna's books

My new book on domestic abuse is on sale right now

Do you ever wonder if you might be a victim of domestic abuse? My new Kindle book, Am I Being Abused? A Woman’s Guide to Domestic Abuse, can help you to answer that question. It’s on sale through Sunday.  If you get a copy and like it, please leave a review so others will know that it’s worth reading. Thanks!

 

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Posted in Anna's books, domestic abuse, Uncategorized

Am I Being Abused? Kindle book is Finally Truly Ready!!! yea!

I got my first book up on Kindle officially a little over a month ago. I wrote it, edited it, put it up, and was seriously unhappy with the way it looked. So I worked on it. Again and again and again.

In the meantime, my husband–our abuser–was fired yet again from his job. He lasted in this one six years. Before that, he was unemployed for two years. Before that, he was fired from four separate jobs over a period of four years. And even more before those.

He’s been seriously grumpy. Depressed. Angry. Frustrated. It’s affecting everything.

I’ve been really sick this past month. I have a bunch of chronic health issues, and with all the stress they reared their ugly head big time. But the Lord is good, and He was with me all the time. Helping me. Guiding me. Protecting all of us.

So now, finally, after every single thing, my new Kindle book is finally looking the way I want it to look. And I’ve learned a few things (or a few dozen) about getting kindle books up and ready. The name of it is Am I Being Abused? A Woman’s Guide to Domestic Abuse.

I’m having a promotion starting next Sunday. The price will drop to 99 cents, and work its way back up from there to its normal price of $3.99.

Here’s the Amazon description of my book and a look at the table of contents:

Written by a domestic abuse survivor and the co-author of A Cry for Justice: How the Evil of Domestic Abuse Hides in Your Church, this new book helps women navigate the difficult question: Am I being abused?

If the thought has crossed your mind that you might be a victim of domestic abuse, the most important question that you can ask yourself is: Am I afraid of my husband? If fear defines your relationship, something is seriously wrong. There is a world of difference in an unhappy marriage and an abusive marriage. As you read through this book, you’ll develop the tools necessary to tell the difference.
In this book, you’ll learn…

~How to tell if you are a victim of domestic abuse
~How to tell the difference between true and false repentance
~What you need to do if you are in an abusive relationship
~How to identify your God-given rights

With lists, questions, recommendations, and guidelines Am I Being Abused? A Christian Woman’s Guide to Domestic Abuse offers the reader a way through the valley of abuse and into hope and healing.

A message to my readers

Introduction

Dedication

Chapter 1 Confused, mixed up, brokenhearted feelings

Chapter 2 Am I being abused?

Chapter 3 Delving deeper

Chapter 4 He said he was sorry: true vs. false repentance

Chapter 5 Our God-given rights

Chapter 6 Practical matters

Chapter 7 Things that have been a blessing to me

Is divorce permissible in cases of domestic abuse?

Am I saved?

About the author

Resources

If you’ve got any questions about it (or about abuse in general), or if you just want to share your story, leave a comment on here or message me at thecrossisall@gmail.com.

Hope to hear from you.

Soli Deo Gloria!

Anna

 

 

 

Posted in trusting Jesus

Tired of pit living

My husband was fired last Monday. Today is his official termination date. He’s on his way over to pick up his things as I type. He’s been fired before. Multiple times.

Sometimes your world just turns upside down. Ours has turned upside down so often, I hardly react to it when it does. It’s just “Okay, it happened again. What do we do?”

I don’t want to live like this anymore.

Today I took some steps towards changing things. For me. For my children. My husband will have to do that for himself. I can’t. Not anymore.

It’s not that I don’t want to. It’s that it’s impossible to.

He doesn’t listen to those who try to help him. He won’t go to a counselor. He just turns a deaf ear and does what he wants to and he always winds up in a pit. I’m tired of pit living.

He has to know what he is. He has to know that what he does is wrong, He has to see that he always…always…ends up in the same place. Not just professionally, but in everything.

He’s an abuser. He’s careless with his career, just as he is with us. It’s gone on too long. It’s time for a change.

He’s taken everything from us. Everything except our faith, our tenacity, our determination. The more he did to us, the more those grew.

I want a new life, and by God’s grace and with His guidance, I’m willing to do whatever it takes to get it.

By God’s grace and with His help, I will.

Dear Lord,

Please help us. We have no other help but Yours. We know not where to turn, where to go, or what to do. Guide us, please. Your way is the way we want. We desire that Your will shall now and always be our will. 

In Jesus’s Name,

Amen

Posted in domestic abuse, trusting Jesus

A good day in the midst of the bad

It’s been a good day. In our situation, finding something normal to do is nearly impossible. So it’s a really great feeling when we do. Today was one of those days.

In our situation, finding something normal to do is nearly impossible. So it’s a really great feeling when we do. Today was one of those days.

Nothing has changed. We’re still facing eviction unless something drastic changes. We’re still living with an abuser. We’re still struggling with health issues. We’re still…so much more.

But today, we laughed. We talked. We enjoyed one another. We simply had a bit of fun.

God was good today, as He is always. If we’d not been able to laugh, God still would have been good. As it was, He enabled us to laugh. To forget the enormity of our problems for just a little while.

Tonight reality is weighing a little heavier on me. My husband is calling around, looking for help that he’s not going to find. He just told a friend of his that we’re about to go under. I don’t know what to do. But what I will do is this: Tonight when I get into bed, I will pray. I will turn our struggles over to the Lord, just as I do every night. And I will trust in Him no matter what.

And I will remember today and smile.

 

 

Posted in domestic abuse, trusting Jesus

Too many questions with no answers

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? When there are far too many questions and you have no answers at all? If you are a Christian, you turn to Jesus.

I couldn’t have made it through the days and years of my life without the Lord. Just like His Word says, when my father and my mother abandoned (or abused) me, He took me up (Psalms 27:10). Added to that was when faced with chronic illness, when poverty struck, when my babies were lost to miscarriage, when my husband abused me, when two of my nine children pushed me out of their lives, when…. so many other things.

Jesus is not only the Way, the Truth, and the Life, He is also the only One that has ever been faithfully faithful to me. So, just like so many times before, I’m turning to Him, trusting Him to make a way where there is no way.

My husband is still abusive. He is abusive to the point where my teenaged daughter felt the need to start a GoFundMe to try to find the means of our leaving him.

On top of his abuse, he’s financially inept. He’s gone bankrupt three times. He owes everybody and his brother, and then some. He’s borrowed from all of his family, again and again, and never repaid. He’s borrowed from others and never repaid. He’s also gotten money from others with no intention of repaying, as in “hey, can you give me this?” He owes landlords money in two states. We’ve lived in a state of deprivation forever. He is educated but makes little, and wastes what little he has. We struggle for everything that comes our way.

Now, the landlord, because of lack of pay, is demanding that we leave or pay him. He has started an eviction process. We have no money to go with, and nowhere to go. It, like everything, is in Jesus’s very capable hands.

And to top things off, my husband might be being fired. He failed to pass his evaluation. So we won’t even have any income. If he’s fired, it won’t really be that surprising. They’ve been threatening to fire him for a while now, and it’s a state job. It’s hard to get fired from a state job. But he’s good at being fired. He’s been fired multiple times in his career.

My husband’s health is failing, as is his mood. He’s falling apart. Honestly, I ache for him. I don’t hate him. I do hate what he’s done to us, but I know that my real battle is with Satan. My husband is simply a tool in his hands. He’s falling apart physically and emotionally. And that’s just one more thing on us.

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? You turn to the One who not only knows the way, but is the Way.

I’ve done that, and I’m leaning hard on Him, to make streams in the desert, paths where there are none, and to show us how and where and when to travel where He leads us, and to provide the means of doing so. We struggle daily to survive. Hand in hand with my Lord, I’m working towards changing that.

I’m working on changing everything.

 

Posted in domestic abuse, trusting Jesus

Letting go

The other day, I let go. I simply can’t do it anymore. For far too long, I’ve traveled the road of trying to do everything that needed doing, including things someone else needed to do but wouldn’t do, and I did it with an abusive husband breathing down my neck, his family picking apart everything I did, and even two now adult children (two out of my nine) seeing me as the bad parent and never-failing to let me know what they thought of me, and because of the influence of my husband on the churches we’ve attended, often without a church to lean on (except in rare occasions).

I’m tired. Beyond tired. I’m exhausted. And, honestly, I have no idea what to do anymore.

So I’m letting go. Or, rather, I already have.

I simply didn’t know what else to do.

God is the only One who can possibly know my way. My way is so hard, so confusing, so filled with fear that, without Him, there’s no hope. He knows the way that I need to travel. I only need to let go and follow Him.

As the moments crawl into days, I’ll fill y’all in a bit more on God’s wondrous ways and my tentative steps in following Him. If you’re new here, welcome. If you’ve been here a while, welcome back. Let’s join our hearts and voices as we praise our wondrous Lord.

If you’re here and not a Christian, you are still welcome. May you see His amazing grace as we travel on.

Anna

Posted in Uncategorized

Name and direction change for blog

Dear readers,

I’ve changed my direction or, truth be told, it was changed for me. So, along with my life, I’m changing the direction of this blog. It will still be about domestic abuse, but now it will be more my story and the story of how the Lord is graciously leading me. If you aren’t interested, I understand. But if you are, welcome. If you know someone who might be interested in the story of how the Lord is working in the lives of one of His very frail and broken servants, please let them know.

God bless you.